CLT Blog » Meck

Free Meck! Donate to suicide prevention in honor of lost UNCC student

Meck — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 15:28:31 +0000

UPDATE: The fundraiser ended at midnight on 6/5/2010. Winners of the drawings will be posted shortly on http://kuwtb.com and twitter. Thank you all for your generous support. I’ve reached AFSP’s participation goal!

When I was a junior at UNCC, I lost a close friend to suicide. You can read the story of how suicide affected my life below.*

Now I need your help. I’m having a fundraiser for American Foundation for Suicide Prevention through the end of the week, and my goal is to raise $2000. Every $5 donation to AFSP enters you to win 2 Orchestra Tickets to Wicked, a $100 Visa gift card, a 1 hour massage from Felicitea, and gift certificates to Dilworth Billiards and Amelie’s French Bakery.

I need at $1000 to be able to participate in the Overnight Walk in Boston later this month, as of this posting I’m about $250 away.

But if I can raise $2000, I’ll reveal my identity. No excuses.

If you can, please read my story and make a donation today.

And consider tweeting the following to help spread the word:

I helped @MeckCharlotte raise money for suicide prevention in honor of UNCC student Heather Brink http://cltblog.com/7345 #freemeck

Thank you.

Narrative Summary of the Circumstances Surrounding Death

Tattoos? Birds/seagulls in flight…

On March 18^th 2007 I woke up. I got dressed, brushed my teeth, and went to breakfast at IHOP with my boyfriend. I came back to the dorm to see an ambulance parked outside of our building with the doors open. A girl was hanging on a boy. She was crying. That was when I knew.

Not really knew what, of course, but knew something. Something was wrong. I went back to my dorm room to change for Greek Week rehearsal. Then Gabby knocked on my bedroom door.

“Meck” (and I wish that right here I could tell you what her voice sounded like. I can’t describe it. But I can still hear it. Even right now).

“Get in the study room.”

I exited my room and saw her and Kirkley Fan making their way down my hallway. Pounding. Screaming. I made eye contact long enough with Kirkley Fan for her to see the question on my face.

“Heather fell out her window last night.”

Tattoo, cursive “silence”

I pushed past her to the adjacent hallway and saw police loitering outside Heather’s open door. Jlo was crying. Her boyfriend shifted uncomfortably. I made my way to the study room. Now this is where it starts to bleed. Not the memories. Those remain. Stuck. I couldn’t wish them away even if I wanted to. But when I look back, I’m not really sure what order everything happened in. The whole first 24 hours, when I allow myself to turn it on, plays like a broken reel. Images cycling, repeating.

There’s Ashley stumbling. She looks like she’s drunk. But she’s not. She just can’t walk. The other Ashley is dry heaving into a trash can. For some reason we are all sitting the same way. On the floor. Knees pulled up to our chests, arms holding on. Gabby is uncharacteristically calm, reading to us from a sorority crisis handbook. Do not talk to the media. Do not call the family. Do not tell anyone outside the Chapter. Jenny is staring at a wall. Kristina is holding Amy up. Jessica is picking at her toes. Jenn is tugging her hair. Noses are sniffling.

Next, the police want to know what the past weekend looked like. We all know what it looked like. It was Heather’s goodbye party. It had been a weekend of drinking and saying goodbye, because she said she was withdrawing from school. Leaving early. She told us she was going home.

“The friends locked the door behind them when they left and that was the last time anyone saw her alive.”

So then we said the stupidest thing we could say. That she was fine. Because of course she wasn’t. She had a history of bipolar disorder and had been struggling with mania and medications. Her mother died by suicide, father wasn’t around, and she was raised by her grandfather and they often didn’t get along. She had tried to die once before, on these very same floors, when he forgot her birthday. She hadn’t been fine.

Except that, for those past few days, she was. She was great and seemed truly happy. In fact it is one of only a few times I remember her being that way. She was difficult to get along with. Her mood could change in an instant. But she had been so grateful those few days. So carefree. So aware of her friendships. And sad, in hindsight too sad, to be saying goodbye for just one summer.

School officials came. The Dean, a counselor. They told us they understood. That they had been there. But they were so awkward. Holding us at arm’s length. Probing for details we were too numb to give. After they left that afternoon, they never contacted us again.

When we were out of lockdown it was time for the phone tree. To call all the sisters up to our hall who didn’t live there. To plan what to do next. As soon as the Dean and sisters cleared the room for a minute it was just Gabby and Kirkley Fan and me. We were looking at each other and I had to ask a question to kill the fleeting hope that was chewing on my stomach. A question I knew the answer to, even though no one said it yet. No one would. No one would tell us what was happening, what we all knew. “She’s dead, isn’t she?” Gabby looked away with tears welling in her eyes. Kirkley Fan bit her lip and nodded. And there it was.

“Further history indicates…”

Over the next 24 hours we took a walk. It was unseasonably warm and sunny outside. Four of us sat on a rock in Van Landingham Glen and watched the clouds pass and just talked about her. Talked for hours about what she did and who she was. How she smelled. Her tattoos. The ways she used to piss us off. The time she was drunk at a party. Anything. Everything. We went back to the dorm. That’s when the stories started. At least 3 different people were claiming to have found the body. One sister found out from a TV news reporter. Then people started coming. Moms. Old sisters. Girls who had been out of town. Girls who had quit the sorority came back. Friends I had a falling out with, seeing them brought tears to my eyes. “I’m sorry.” “Me too.” They brought food. Campus organizations brought flowers. And we started our traditions. We draped our charter and turned our badges upside down. We made candles for our ceremonies and had meetings and wrote stories and made slide shows and planned a memorial. We took to the internet and searched for reasons and warning signs and understanding. We found American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and gained some of the information we needed (but of course not an answer to the question that ate away at each of us: what should I have done?) We bought cigarettes and smoked them in “her spot” on the wall outside our dorm. We painted her bathroom locker to resemble the towel she hung over the door. We did everything we thought we needed to do to mourn. But we were just beginning a lifetime’s journey.

“The decedent was discovered lying behind the dorm building where she was a resident on the 10^th floor on the campus of UNC-Charlotte.”

Two nights later when I was waiting in the building lobby I overheard our security guard talking on his cell phone. “Yep… Jumped out the window… ten floors… I’m telling you….It was like” he said as he brought his hand down on the desk. “Smack!”

There were denials. It was an accident. It was suspicious. It was homicide. Maybe it was one of the sisters. And then a friend showed me Mydeathspace, a message board that posts the myspace profiles of the recently deceased and speculates about the cause of death. On her myspace page, next to her picture, Heather had wrote “on a scale of 1 to 10, I’m awesome”. One of the Mydeathspace posters mocked the quote saying “more like starting at 10 and embedded at 1.”

She didn’t leave a note although her AIM profile contained the lyrics to the Valencia song “The closest I am to living life on the edge.” It goes:

Lets build a rocket to the moon
Just you and I
We could start a whole new world up there
Leave our past behind
Behind

Sometimes I can’t believe my eyes
I want to stare up
And get lost in the city lights
Because I’ve had enough and this is the end
And now I understand
That a heart breaks it does not bend

Someone please help me out
I never meant to take this so far
Now I’ve fallen way too hard
Take a long step back to
To The days when I was younger
Decisions never mattered all this much

It’s an emptied handed promise
From my heart to my conscious
That says one day I will make this count

Report of Investigation by Medical Examiner

Three months after Heather’s death I was working as a legal assistant, and while searching through online forms I found a way to request a Medical Examiner’s Report. So I did. But then something terrible happened: it came in the mail, along with its drawings and cold reality.

Around six months after, I started having dreams about her. They all followed the same pattern: I run into Heather somewhere and I am shocked. She tells me she faked her death. I am furious. She says, “Aren’t you happy to see me, didn’t you plead with god that you’d do anything to see me again.” And I respond, screaming, “You ruined our lives!”

Tattoo “whom a heart breaks it doesn’t mend”

It’s been three years now since she died. I’ve done a lot to move on with my life. In 2008, Kirkley Fan, Gabby, La’Nolan and I, along with two other sisters, did AFSP’s Out of the Darkness Overnight in New York City. Six of us raised $7000 for the organization. This year we will walk again in Boston. I’ve sought therapy. I’ve begun chasing dreams. Heather was the person who recommended that I take Intro to Fiction Writing. I did, and it altered my entire path. I can’t help but notice how much has changed since that day. But in a lot of ways, I feel stuck there.

Kirkley Fan said she hoped Heather would haunt her. In that long semester of sleepless nights, blinds shut, living in what felt like funeral home, when I avoided even walking past her old doorway, I prayed many times that she wouldn’t haunt me. But she has.

She’s there all the time. Her shadow can darken a lot of things. At my dad’s birthday dinner in December, someone innocently brought up the tragedy of a person jumping from a local bridge. I swallowed hard as an awkward silence consumed the table. And anytime someone makes a casual “I want to kill myself” joke, a light switch is flipped on in my mind. Certain memories once again illuminated.

I think most often about a few things. La’Nolan getting the phone call on the road in Boston and beating on her steering wheel screaming “fuck you, Heather, fuck you.” The alienation I felt from the UNCC campus for so long, and the way it postponed my life. The bottle of ambien I flushed in the early days after her death because I didn’t trust myself. The campus workers packing her room, and the way the sunlight flooded it when they took down her black curtains. Spending nights in bed with Gabby because I couldn’t sleep alone. Leah grabbing my hand when someone fell from the roof in a movie we were watching. The ex boyfriend who told me he understood my pain because he had recently lost his grandmother and how furious it made me. Me telling Heather at lunch the Thursday before she died that I hated when we all left school for the summer, because it felt like my college friends were dead to me. Her knocking on my door that same Thursday morning with tears in her eyes saying “I just wanted to say goodbye.”

I try to cherish the positive changes her death set in motion. Girls join a sorority to gain sisters, but it wasn’t until March 18 that those women truly became my family. I still talk to some of them every day. I am a writer now, or trying to be, thanks to Heather. Gabby decided to pursue a master’s in college student development, and got the position of Resident Director because of her exemplary work as our RA after it happened. Kirkley Fan is going back to school for nursing, considering work in the mental health field. Some people might speculate that this is all part of something bigger that we don’t yet understand. I am not one of them, but I am grateful for how we’ve made do.

I’m also grateful, or try to be, for the new understanding I gained. Even for my awareness of my own mortality and that of my friends. For the guy in a taco bell parking lot that saw my Overnight t-shirt and asked me how to help his friend in Raleigh who he feared might hurt herself. For the friends who reached out to me and who I took to the Emergency Room before something irreversible happened. For the chances to challenge the stigma and maybe help someone the way I couldn’t help Heather.

But you know what? I am still sad. I am still mourning. Because like in my dreams, Heather is alive, but she isn’t. She’s on facebook, and people still comment regularly on her wall. She pops up in mutual friends lists. She’s at the heart of our Overnight efforts and the friendship that binds Gabby, Kirkley Fan, La’Nolan and me. She’s in our careers. In our thoughts. In the Medical Examiner’s report tucked away in my closet among old cards and tax returns.

Maybe I’m hung up on it. Maybe it’s wrong that I can’t just let go. Maybe I shouldn’t still be grieving. Maybe I shouldn’t still start to feel depressed when the weather turns to spring. Maybe I shouldn’t hide under the covers when the sun starts to shine and I smell the air, waiting with dread for March 18^th to roll around and the movie to start playing. And maybe I’m a little angry that I’m stuck with this story. Maybe I’m pissed because I was 22 and didn’t know the world could be so ugly. Maybe I wanted to find that out on my own terms. Maybe I didn’t want to have to change. But I had to, had to change after it happened. Maybe I’m just mourning myself. Because the girl I used to be died along with her.

Diagrams

I unpacked that Medical Examiner’s report today, and when I was reading it I noticed something I hadn’t before. On Heather’s arm, written in ink, was “Call Casey.” I didn’t know Casey, so Gabby and I checked Heather’s Facebook. No friends with that name. Maybe she unfriended her because it was too hard suddenly seeing her face again whenever the site randomly dictated? Maybe it was her way of saying goodbye? Of moving on? Or maybe she doesn’t have an account?

But I thought, what if Casey feels the way I do about it? What if she didn’t get to say goodbye to Heather? What if she hadn’t talked to Heather in awhile, and then found out she had died? What if they had been fighting? What if she was still searching for something, some tidbit of information that would provide her with the ever elusive closure that we all secretly desire? If I was her, even now, I would want to know. I would want to know she was going to call.

Originally published on Keeping Up with the Belks, an anonymous blog. Some names have been changed.

On to the Championship Game!

Meck — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 14:28:15 +0000

In the highest scoring games of the tournament, your final two teams have made their mark.

Click here to skip over to voting in the Championship game, if you like.

The US National Whitewater Center rushed past The Penguin, 88-68.

Uptown rose above NoDa Gallery Crawls, 84-72.

Now 1-seed Uptown will face 16-seed US National Whitewater Center in the highly anticipated championship game! Let’s take a look back to how these two teams got to where they are now…

Top-seeded Uptown dominated easily from the beginning. It took out the Burb’s, Rogue Helicopter Pilot, and Jake Delhomme’s retirement in decisive victories. It also sent home crowd favorites and above-average contenders Amelie’s and NoDa Gallery Crawls. Uptown enters the final round on a streak that doesn’t want to stop.

The US National Whitewater Center took down fellow outdoor attraction Carowinds easily in the first round. The team also easily covered up Future’s Boob, drove past Queens & Queens, and bagged up Harris Teeter. Perhaps most telling was the final four, where USNWC easily defeated game-favorite The Penguin. The US National Whitewater Center is confident and focused from their unlikely run to the top. Uptown would be a fool to underestimate them now.

Voting will take place over the weekend, and the first ever CLT Madness Champion will be announced Monday. There can only be one winner, so vote now and vote often!

Final Four!

Meck — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 15:16:29 +0000

A skyline, man-made rapids, a restaurant, and Soho’s little sister. The first ever CLTmadness Final Four is set! If you picked these teams in your bracket, I’d like to shake your hand. Let’s take a look at the results from the Elite 8 games!

Click here to skip over to voting in the Final Four, if you like. You can download a big version of the second round bracket too.

Mecklenburg

The Penguin(5) chewed up and spit out the Light rail(13), 80-39

Cabarrus

Noda gallery crawls(14) strolled past Prices Chicken(5), 63-56

Union

The US National Whitewater Center(16) bagged up Harris Teeter(14), 70-50

Gaston

Uptown(1) sent home Amelie’s(6), 63-56

There you have it! A 5-seed, 14-seed, 16-seed, and 1-seed left. Powerhouse The Penguin will face the Cinderella story and raging rapids of the US National Whitewater Center. Relentless NoDa Gallery Crawls will take on the Uptown fortress.

Which team is your favorite? Which team can’t you live without? Vote now and vote often! The final two will be announced Friday morning.

Elite 8! On to Round 4 of CLT Madness!

Meck — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 20:08:38 +0000

Talk about some upsets! Let’s recap the best and the worst of the Sweet 16.

Click here to skip over to voting in Round 4, if you like. You can download a big version of the second round bracket too.

Mecklenburg

Running on a streak hotter than their fried pickles, The Penguin took out Trade and Tryon, 55-30. The Light Rail cut down Myers Park Trees, 44-41.

Cabarrus

Price’s Chicken sent the Transplants home once and for all, 53-32. In a shocking upset, NoDa Gallery Crawls beat Brooklyn Decker 55-30. Seriously? Think long and hard about which one you’d rather check out on a Friday night. Yea.

Union

Charlotte’s second most famous cross-streets was also sent packing, when the US National Whitewater Center narrowly defeated Queens & Queens, 45-42. Harris Teeter knocked out Getting Gas in South Carolina, 48-39.

Gaston

The only 1 seed remaining, Uptown benched Jake Delhomme’s retirement, 60-25. Powerhouse Amelies dominated Ric Flair, 63-22.

Only 8 teams left in the tournament! Will the Penguin scarf down the Light Rail? Will Price’s Chicken finally fall in the face of NoDa Gallery Crawls unrelenting, and more likely to be on the master cleanse, fan base? Will Cinderella story US National Whitewater Center be able to take out fellow Cinderella Harris Teeter? And in the match-up to watch, who will be left standing: Uptown or Amelie’s?

Vote now for your favorites! And be sure to come back Wednesday morning to see your Final Four!

Results:

Mecklenburg:
The Penguin(5)/Trade & Tryon(1): 55-30
Light rail(13)/Myers Park trees(10): 44-41

Cabarrus:
Price’s Chicken(5)/Transplants(1): 53-32
NoDa gallery crawls(14)/Brooklyn Decker(2): 55-30

Union:
US National Whitewater Center(16)/Queens & Queens(4): 45-42
Harris Teeter(14)/Getting gas in South Carolina(2): 48-39

Gaston:
Uptown(1)/Jake Delhomme’s retirement(12): 60-25
Amelies(6)/Ric Flair(2): 63-22

Sweet 16! On to Round 3 of CLT Madness!

Meck — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 14:37:14 +0000

Cinderella stories and heartbreaking upsets! After an awesome set of match-ups, we now have our Sweet 16! Let’s take a look at some of the action from Round 2…

Click here to skip over to voting in Round 3, if you like. You can download a big version of the second round bracket too.

Mecklenburg:
Trade and Tryon blew out Pat McCrory’s hair, 86-42. The Penguin scarfed down Construction Cranes, 108-21. In a close match-up, the Light Rail narrowly prevailed over Freedom Park 67-60.
In this region’s surprising upset, Myers Park Trees beat Brotha Fred, 111-17.

Cabarrus:
Transplants sent Bank of America packing, 71-57. Price’s Chicken chomped Symphony in the Park, 76-51. Brooklyn Decker outshined Sir Purr, 80-47.
NoDa Gallery Crawls might be this year’s Cinderella story, as they took down Bill Belk in the highest scoring match, 114-14. Um, were there even 114 people at the last gallery crawl?

Union:
Another Cinderella, US National Whitewater Center took out Future’s boob, 82-47. It’s the only 16 seed left in the game! Queens & Queens blew past Hurricane Hugo, 94-33. Yet another Cinderella, Harris Teeter took down Plaza-Midwood hipsters, 70-57. And Getting gas in South Carolina beat the Top Cats, 79-48.

Gaston:
Uptown grounded the Rogue Helicopter Pilot, 95-32. Jake Delhomme’s retirement benched Chilly Willy, 85-42. Amelie’s out-charmed Airport Rocking Chairs, 86-41. And Ric Flair pinned Rev. Bill Graham, 76-51.

A full list of winners and losers is below. Be sure to vote in the Sweet 16 over the weekend! Results will be posted Monday morning.

Round 2 results:

Mecklenburg
Trade & Tryon(1)/PatMcCrory’s haird(8): 86-42
The Penguin(5)/Construction Cranes(4): 108-21
Light rail(13)/Freedom Park(14): 67-60
Myers Park trees(10)/Brotha Fred(2): 111-17

Cabarrus
Transplants(1)/Bank of America(9): 71-57
Price’s Chicken(5)/Symphony in the Park(4): 76-51
NoDa gallery crawls(14)/Bill Belk(11): 114-14
Brooklyn Decker(2)/Sir Purr(7): 80-47

Union
US National Whitewater Center(16)/Future’s boob(9): 82-47
Queens & Queens(4)/Hurricane Hugo(12): 94-33
Harris Teeter(14)/Plaza-Midwood hipsters(11): 70-57
Getting gas in South Carolina(2)/Top Cats(10): 79-48

Gaston
Uptown(1)/Rogue Helicopter Pilot(8): 95-32
Jake Delhomme’s retirement(12)/Chilly Willy(4): 85-42
Amelies(6)/Airport rocking chairs(3): 86-41
Ric Flair(2)/Rev. Billy Graham(7): 76-51

CLT Madness Round 1 results are in! On to Round 2!

Meck — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:54:57 +0000

This morning at 9am the exciting first round of CLT madness came to a close. Let’s take a look at the action in each of the four regions.

Click here to skip over to voting in Round 2, if you like. You can download a big version of the first round bracket too.

Mecklenburg

Trade and Tryon handily defeated The Gold Rush, 103-24. No surprises there. Pat McCrory’s hair brushed past Anthony Foxx 79-49, and The Penguin crushed The Booty Loop 98-30. Now that’s what I call a big block!

In the regions first upset, The Light Rail drove down 485, 81-48. The Green was mowed down by Freedom Park, 91-36. And Construction Cranes rose above Vacant Bank Offices, 93-35.

The Myers Park Trees are feeling good this morning after finally defeating Cankerworms, 106-21.

In what began as a close game, Brotha Fred pulled away in the end to defeat Matt and Ramona 70-56.

Cabarrus

In what was almost a startling upset, Transplants narrowly sent The Meck Dec. packing, 63-61. Bank of America topped Wellschovia, 73-51.

In a dissapointing game for vegans, The Disco Chicken was fried by Prices Chicken, 82-41. Squak! Symphony in the Park laid Settler’s Cemetary to rest, 97-27.

A long time rivalry ended in upset when Bill Belk took down Bill Diehl, 69-53. Go judges! And a real crowd pleaser, NoDa Gallery Crawls easily upset Speed Street, 76-47.

In the battle of the mascots, Sir Purr out-cuted Rufus, 96-27. And Brooklyn Decker easily took down Unknown Hinson in a battle of looks and celebrity,90-33.

Union

In a shocking upset, The US National Whitewater Center zipped past Carowinds, 66-59. In another close match-up, Future’s Boob came out on top of UNCC’s Belk Tower, 65-60.

The closest game so far, Hurricane Hugo blew over Sandra and Leon Levine, 63-61. Queens&Queens confused The Big Rock and took the win, 106-19. And the Plaza Midwood hipsters rallied to prove their superiority of McMansions, 87-37.

In another shocking upset, Harris Teeter gobbled up the Queen’s Feast, 79-46.

In the battle of the cheerleaders, the Panther’s Top Cats out danced the Lady Cats, 73-52. Meanwhile, Getting gas in South Carolina ran circles around NASCAR, 85-14.

Gaston

Uptown easily beat the ‘burbs, 94-31. David Thompsons Rogue Helicopter Pilot topped viral rival Cubby’s Beyonce Impression, 88-38.

In another crowd pleaser, Jake Delhomme’s retirement outshone Bobby Lutz’s retirement, 97-27. Talk about a big payout!

Chilly Willy smoked Hugh McColl 64-61 in a close matchup. Amelies chewed up the Epicentre, 84-41. In a close game, Airport rocking chairs benched 7th Street Station, 66-59.

The Rev. Billy Graham took down Rev. Rob of Apple Auto Sales, 74-51. Can I get an amen?

And to close out Round 1, Ric Flair pulled out on top of SouthPark Madam, 94-32. Wooooo!

The full list of winners and losers is below. Remember to vote today and tomorrow for the second round and check in Friday for the results.

Will potential Cinderall stories US National Whitewater center, NoDA gallery crawls, Harris Teeter and Hurrican Hugo have what it takes to make the Sweet 16?
Will a Rogue Helicopter Pilot encircle Uptown?
Will Pat McCrory’s hair continue to dominate?
Will Brotha Fred be able to beat Trees?

Vote now and stay tuned…

Round 1 results:

Mecklenburg

Trade & Tryon(1)/Gold Rush(16): 103-24

Pat McCrory’s hair(8)/Anthony Foxx(9): 79-49

The Penguin(5)/The booty loop(12): 98-30

Construction Cranes(4)/Vacant bank offices(13): 93-35

The Light Rail(13)/485(6): 81-48

Freedom Park(14)/The Green(3): 91-36

Myers Park Tress(10)/Cankerworms(7): 106-21

BrothaFred(2)/Matt&Ramona(15): 70-56

Cabarrus:

Transplants(1)/The Meck Dec.(16): 63-61

Bank of America(9)/Wellschovia(8): 73-51

Prices Chicken(5)/The Disco Chicken(12): 82-41

Symphony in the Park(4)/Settler’s Cemetery(13): 97-27

Bill Belk(11)/Bill Diehl(6): 69-53

NoDa Gallery Crawls(14)/SpeedStreets(3): 76-47

Sir Purr(7)/Rufus(10): 96-27

Brooklyn Decker(2)/Unknown Hinson(15): 90-33

Union:

US National Whitewater Center(16)/Carowinds(1): 66-59

Future’s Boob(9)/Belk Tower(8): 65-60

Hurricane Hugo(12)/Sandra and Leon Levine(5): 63-61

Queens&Queens(4)/The Big Rock(13): 106-19

Plaza-midwood hipsters(11)/McMansions(6): 87-37

Harris Teeter(14)/Queens Feast(3): 79-46

Top Cats(10)/Lady Cats(7): 73-52

Getting gas in SC(2)/NASCAR(15): 85-41

Gaston:

Uptown(1)/The ‘Burbs(16): 94-31

Rogue Helicopter Pilot(8)/Cubby’s Beyonce impression(9): 88-38

Jake Delhomme’s Retirement(9)/Bobby Lutz’s retirement(8): 97-27

Chilly Willy(4)/Hugh McColl(13): 64-61

Amelies(6)/The epicentre(11): 84-41

Airport Rocking Chairs(3)/7th Street Station(14): 66-59

Rev. Billy Graham(7)/ Rev. Rob of Apple Auto Sales(10): 74-51

Ric Flair(2)/SouthPark Madam(15): 94-32

Local media Mad Libs

Meck — Sat, 26 Dec 2009 21:34:05 +0000

I was waiting on an order of Bunny Rancheros at Zada Janes, flipping through a Creative Loafing, when I had an amazing idea. Are you ready? Wait for it…Local Media Madlibs! Right? Right?!

Okay, so you already knew that from the title but, get excited anyway. Local Media Madlibs…yippee!

Wait, what are madlibs? Since I know you are too lazy to google it yourself, Madlibs is a “phrasal template word game where one player prompts another for a list of words to substitute for blanks in a story; these word substitutions have a humorous effect when the resulting story is then read aloud.” [wikipedia]

See, humorous effect. Sounds mind-blowing, doesn’t it? And even better, I localized it. Do I know my CLT Blog readers, or do I know my CLT Blog readers?!

So here’s your first game, based on John Groom’s “Stupid Thing of the Week: Minors and Moonshine“. Grab a friend and give it a try. And in case I need it, I’ve posted an example below from the test round I played with Justin Ruckman.

The Game:

Ask a friend to pick a…

Adjective -

Noun -

Plural noun (thing) -

Charlotte celebrity (female) -

Charlotte celebrity (male) –

Local Street name –

Charlotte bar –

Chain restaurant -

Type of person –

Local county –

Noun (thing) -

Verb -

Adjective -

Plural noun-

Charlotte neighborhood –

Now fill them in for your customized local media story…

Not too much doubt about the winner of the adjective award this time around. For pure noun, you just can’t top selling noun (thing) out of a daycare center. That’s what Charlotte celebrity (female) and her husband, Charlotte celebrity (male), were charged with at their daycare operation off local street name. What made the case even more award-worthy was Charlotte celebrity (female)’s web site description of her center as a place where local youth are counseled to avoid charlotte bar and chain restaurant. The real topper, though, was Charlotte celebrity (female)’s explanation for the arrest, in which she claimed that she loaned $80 to a type of person from Local County, who gave her a noun (thing) to hold until a woman came by to verb it up. The woman turned out to be an adjective agent, who promptly arrested the daycare center owner. Charlotte female celebrity says she had no idea what was in the noun (thing), and that she had been set up by a neighbor who hates her for working with plural noun in Charlotte neighborhood. So far, we’ve heard of no one who actually believes her.

Example:

Not too much doubt about the winner of the slimy award this time around. For pure baby, you just can’t top selling spoons out of a daycare center. That’s what Meck Charlotte and her husband, David Thompson, were charged with at their daycare operation off Independence Blvd. What made the case even more award-worthy was Meck Charlotte’s web site description of her center as a place where local youth are counseled to avoid Thomas Street Tavern and Applebees. The real topper, though, was Meck Charlotte’s explanation for the arrest, in which she claimed that she loaned $80 to a extra-planetary cultural anthropologist from Gaston County, who gave her a clothespin to hold until a woman came by to google it up. The woman turned out to be a googly agent, who promptly arrested the daycare center owner. Meck Charlotte says she had no idea what was in the clothespin, and that she had been set up by a neighbor who hates her for working with chips in Wesley Heights. So far, we’ve heard of no one who actually believes her.

KUWTB

Meck — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 19:28:06 +0000

I had a great idea last June. My idea was to start a blog. I was living with my best friend Gabby at the time and I was like hey, I think I’m going to start a blog, you know, about Charlotte. And she was all, like the Meck Deck? And I was like, huh? To be honest I hadn’t read any Charlotte blogs yet. Actually, I hadn’t read any blogs at all yet, not counting the ones on myspace. But I had a great name. My blog is going to be called Keeping Up with the Belks, I told her, and she was like all ooook, can we watch Rock of Love reruns now?

Even though I’d never blogged before, I was certain that I would be a success. I’d written plenty of short stories and I took fiction writing at UNCC, where Dr. Gwyn would return my work bleeding with praise. Every time I got a draft back with “Um?” and “not sure to say about this one” written in red ink, I knew I was on my way.

I started to do some research to make sure that no one else already had a blog as awesome as mine was going to be. I googled “Charlotte blogs”. I found the Meck Deck. Too political. I found Yuptown. Too masculine. I found the Charlotte Magazine Daily Buzz. Too editorial. And I found CLT Blog. Too #FoJ-y. That’s when I knew, Charlotte needed me, needed a blog that was juuuust right.

Of course it wasn’t that long after I started that Matt and Justin were begging me to be a CLT Blog contributor. It was kind of embarrassing, actually. Matt was all, when are you going to write for us, you can write anything you want. And Justin was all, well actually not anything. And then James was all, hey I thought you were a dude. Then, and they will probably edit this out but I swear it happened, then they actually started fighting over who could convince me first to join the crew. And I was all alright, alright, chillax fellas. I’ll get around to it.

But then I never did. I was killed in a tragic blogging accident. Not really. But I went away for awhile. Why? Well, this next part is hard for me to admit. But when I didn’t win the BoB award for the best local blog it hurt. A lot. And when I didn’t win best twitterer, well, I kind of lost my will to live. When you dedicate so much of your life to the public and it goes unappreciated, that’s the sort of thing that’s tough to bounce back from.

So what happened next? To be honest I spent most of my summer writing dreary short stories, completing the twelve steps of Twitterholics Anonymous (step 8 was particularly time consuming. You can’t imagine how many apology letters I had to send to the Observer) and hanging around the FoJ Lodge. You probably don’t already know this, but I’ve actually been an integral part of the CLT Blog team for months now. I’ve done everything from driving the guys to video shoots to errand running during late night projects. These chores might seem menial to some, but when you have as many talents as I do, you can never serve in just one role. Some might like to call it being a “utility player.” I simply prefer “badass bitch.”

Then three months into my self imposed exile, fate came knocking. Actually it was Justin and Matt. At my front door. At 3am. And they were crying. With the CLT Blog redesign launch still underway (let’s pause here so you can admire how pretty it is…..Okay, that’s enough) it was clear that the site needed something special. Something exciting to draw in potential advertisers. Star power, if you will. No one else was available, or better qualified. I could see why they came to me. But I wasn’t interested. And I tried to tell them. I quit that blogging stuff. But they wouldn’t have it. Please, said Justin, you can write anything you want. And Matt was all, well not anything. Then I was like, you can get off your knees boys. I’ll write one post and that’s it. And then they started crying again. And there’s really only so much of it you can take after an entire summer. So I was like fine. I’ll be a contributor. Now leave me alone so I can write my introduction post. And Justin was all, um that’s weird, I mean, no one’s done it before. And I was like, there’s a first time for everything, duh.